You might have noticed that this entry has nothing to do with the book I'm reading or what I've said this blog was going to be about. Why? Because I'm so tired, I can't think. I literally summoned all the energy I had in my body today and did the MOUNTAIN of work that I had in my e-mail inbox at work this morning and I am just...done.
See, here's the deal. Awhile back, Justin was sleeping in our bed every single night. It was really taking a toll on us because Scott kept getting kicked in the head in the middle of the night and, well, you know...it doesn't help our intimacy issues to have a kid in between us all the time. So, we said, "That's it, buddy. You're moving to your own bed!" We got a trick from Super Nanny (which is such an awesome show!) and she talked about how to get a kid out of your bed. Well, the first night SUCKED...but it WORKED. And, after that, he never wanted to sleep in our bed again. Victory! And it only took ONE night!
Psych! Not victory. Because, the technique that I used was one where you sit in the middle of the child's room while they fall asleep. Each night, you are supposed to move further and further from their bed until you are out in the hallway and the kid has learned how to put himself to sleep. But, I didn't do that...instead, I sat in the rocking chair next to his bed every night. This results in him running into our room at all hours of the night, yelling (to my friend Holly's amusement), "Mommy, get in your chair!" Sometimes, I do it and he goes back to sleep right away and I sneak back into bed easily and it's great. Last night was a first...I was in that chair the ENTIRE night! I would fall asleep and wake up and try to sneak back to bed and he would wake up not five minutes later and beckon me back.
To say that I was angry this morning would be an understatement. I was LIVID. So, once again, I am DONE with this. I honestly can't find enough cuss words to express my frustration. My friend, Kimberly, provided me with this video and my Aunt Terry (who is a psychologist) promised me this would work in under two weeks.
I'm curious as to whether any of my mom friends have dealt with this with their kids. Have you used this technique? And how long did it take to work?
I use the exact same method for time out. It takes an enormous amount of patience, but it does work. You just have to stand strong. Follow a bedtime routine. Start it early (like an hour before you're ready for him to go to bed). A standard (non-bath) night in our house is something like this:
ReplyDelete7p - upstairs to get dressed for bed.
7:15p - movie in our bedroom
7:45p - bathroom for change into pull-up/brush teeth
7:50 - read books, snuggle
8:15p - lights out/music on
Sure, I hear him up there running around or getting toys out that he wants in his bed, or we've caught him sneaking downstairs...but all in all, he's in HIS bed every single night. Even the nights he wakes up in the middle to switch CDs or turn a lamp on, he doesn't mess with us. I've never woken up to find him in our room let alone our bed. And I seriously believe it has everything to do with the routine that we set up for him. The only time I sleep in his bed is if he's sick or he's having a night terror that renders him completely inconsolable. And those nights are far and few between. This mama needs her sleep, darn it, and I'm not about to let some tiny terrorist steal it away from me!
Thank you, Kimberly, for the method and the schedule!!!
ReplyDeleteSo, here is how it went down last night (for all those wondering).
I instituted a similar routine to what Kimberly laid out above. At 7:30pm, I took him upstairs and we changed into Pull-Up/pajamas. Then, we brushed teeth. Then, took him into my room and read books and cuddled - just the two of us - for about 20 minutes. Laid him down and kissed him goodnight and said "It's time for bed." Left the room. He was up in about 2 minutes. Laid him back down, told him it was bedtime, gave him a kiss and left. He yelled for about 5 minutes, "I can't! I can't! I can't!" Then, quiet. It only took 15 minutes and it was all over!!!!
Then, at 1:25am, 2:55am and 5:55am, he came into my room and asked me for chocolate milk. This is usually when I sit in the chair til he falls asleep again. I just took him back to bed, kissed him and told him it was bedtime, and left the room and closed the door. He woke up around 7am this morning.
ReplyDeleteIt was AMAZING! And I slept 8 hours in my own bed with no kid in between my husband and I.
I am hoping this wasn't just a fluke. But we will see tonight.
I'm SO HAPPY!